Observations • 02.17.12
PETA Puts the ‘Whore’ in Media Whore
When word came out a few months ago that PETA was going to use porn to promote their over-the-top vegan causes, it raised a few eyebrows. But the latest stunt the organization is pulling isn’t too much different from the “by any means necessary” mentality some porn companies have with regard to publicity.
If you thought PETA’s latest ad was more about domestic violence, you wouldn’t be alone. A woman in neck brace and who looks like she’s made very, very bad decisions in life when it comes to relationships appears on screen. But fear not — she doesn’t have an abusive spouse, just a boyfriend who turned vegan and is now fucking the shit out of her.
I’m not kidding. PETA calls it BWVAKTBOOM, or Boyfriend Went Vegan and Knocked the Bottom out of Me. It explains the made up condition “occurs when boyfriends go Vegan and can suddenly bring it like a tantric porn star.”
I think PETA is confusing “porn star” with that annoying smug and unearned sense of superiority some vegans put out whenever they’re at a restaurant that serves meat and they order a salad.
A rep from the organization remarked that “the piece is tongue-in-cheek. People who watch the ad all the way through see the woman has a mischievous smile. She’s happy to go back with him. It’s playful.”
Yes, domestic abuse is a laugh riot. As is veal, fur and cosmetic testing on animals.
It’s playful!
Lead Makes you Beautiful
When I was a little girl, a piece of advice was passed on to me that didn’t make sense then but makes more sense the older I get.
Pain makes you beautiful.
Waxings. Eyebrow plucking. Dieting. Working out. Painful endeavors, all them — though each one does, in its own way, make you beautiful.
There’s a corollary to this rule. Women do some pretty stupid shit to be beautiful. There’s Chinese foot binding and African neck stretching. In the West, lead was used in cosmetics but switched to arsenic because lead was too dangerous (irony was also an ingredient, apparently).
But what’s old is new again, and the FDA’s released a list of lead content in lipsticks. What’s surprising is that the brands listed aren’t of the bargain bin drugstore variety. M.A.C., L’Oreal, Shiseido and others are all on the list.
Remember kids, it’s not the red in her lipstick that makes her beautiful. It’s the high lead count.
http://www.fda.gov/Cosmetics/ProductandIngredientSafety/ProductInformation/ucm137224.htm#expanalyses
‘Leave the gun, don’t forget the dildo.’
You don’t need me to tell you that times are tough.
But a rash of crimes across the country rises to the WTF level. The Huffington Post points to a trend of sex shop robberies where the money is a secondary concern, but adult toys and DVDs are what the criminals are really after.
In one case, a clerk in Iowa City was held at knifepoint while a $250 Mega Masturbator (marketed with the tagline of “feeling just like real ass!”) was absconded with. Another Maryland man was arrested for stealing a $99 sex toy, after CSI: Not the Porn Parody matched his DNA to blood in the scene. Teens in Sacramento broke into a store, left the cash but took magazines, movies and dildos (apparently they hadn’t heard of the Internet). However, a pair of gunmen (or gun people) in New York City made off with cash and “electronics.” Finally, there’s the case of a man in Ohio who opened a store’s door with a tractor to steal an $800 sex doll.
That’s right. An $800 sex doll.
The takeaway from these stories, I suppose, is that when you’re out of a job and you’re about to get thrown out of your house, you absolutely, positively need to masturbate.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/07/sex-shop-robberies_n_1260267.html?ref=sex
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