Ways BF’s Kill A Girls Career
Maintaining a relationship in the adult business is magnitudes trickier.
Stick around in this business long enough and you see patterns emerge. There’s the girl who comes in with a boyfriend/husband. Sometimes this male has dreams of finding his fame and fortune through the business end of his erect penis, which rarely happens. There’s also the girl who hooks up with a performer/cameraman/director in the industry and sometimes, there’s the girl who dates a civilian (like yours truly).
Guys like to think they are cool and detached when it comes to sex. That the women get clingy and emotional and can’t make the hard decisions when it comes to someone they’re having sex with on camera.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
Like a Mandelbrot set, there are patterns within patterns. Not only do you see the common archetype of porno boyfriends/husbands, but you also see similar behaviors in each type. More often than not, men can’t stand the thought of their hot, porn star girlfriend getting railed by someone with a bigger dick, so they start taking actions that have a negative effect on their significant other’s career (my boyfriend, though, really is an awesome guy).
More often than not, the “help” they give usually winds up hindering them in the long run.
So for you ladies who’ve always wanted to know how having a boyfriend in this business affects your work, this list’s for you.
Boyfriend/husband becomes her “manager” — If there’s one constant in the industry, it’s guys wanting in to this business. One of the better ways to skip your time as some mope in a bukkake is to come in with a hot girlfriend/wife. But that rarely works (see above). So what’s the next best thing? Managing her career. More often than not this person is duplicating the work of an agent she already has, with little knowledge of the industry. Their usefulness in actually managing talent is questionable.
Boyfriend/husband convinces her to only do bondage/BDSM movies — Fetish shoots, for the most part, do not usually mix sex with pain or being tied up in anyway (though some Internet sites are lenient about this rule). When an up and coming starlet is in a relationship with a guy who can’t take the idea of her taking the dick from someone else, getting a little black and blue seems like a good idea. However, there’s not much work performing exclusivley in bondage and BDSM work, and for a girl with only a few movies to her credit, it’s more often than not a one-way ticket to obscurity especially if she’s not into it.
Boyfriend/husband convinces her to only do girl/girl scenes — Call it a variation on a theme. Only this time, it’s girl/girl action, not being tied up to a post and whipped. The outcome, if she’s done a fair amount of gangbangs and double penetrations to her credit, is more of the same inevitable anonymity. As much as I love sex, I’m a performer as a means to support myself. Limiting the kind of work that you do leads to fewer jobs. If a boyfriend or husband was truly supportive, they’d understand that limiting the kinds of scenes you can be in stunts your options in this industry.
The boyfriend/husband is the only guy she’ll work with — Weak male performers in this business don’t last. For every guy that wants to get in, there’s another five waiting for their shot. Directors and producers talk, and a bad reputation is hard to shake. It’s Darwinism at work. But every so often, a girl comes in and she’ll only work with one man. Yes, initially they’ll both get work because there’s no pussy like new pussy. But the work dries up. Why? More often than not, the guy is a weak performer. But even if it works out watching the same two people having sex gets boring… unless you’re one of the two. (This often leads directly to him “managing” her career, as mentioned above.)
The boyfriend/husband takes her away from all this — I’m not going to lie. Some girls do find sugar daddies. But it’s rare. More often than not, the story you hear is of a girl who got into the business, did a fair amount of scenes and was on track for a bright future, but a boyfriend or husband begged her to come back to wherever she came from. She goes from being able to support herself and then some to being under her man’s thumb for everything.
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